only if we run a train.
done.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
