I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
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