Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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