Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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