He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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