I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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