There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
