Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize
