I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
