i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
