so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Can I color on your dick again?
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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