She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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