He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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