so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
