so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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