Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Fuck appropriateness.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
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