They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Randomize
