walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
