i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
