Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
