And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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