can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize