sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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