She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
