You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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