i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
