dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
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