butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
