the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
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