CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
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