"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
So squirting runs in the family.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Randomize