I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
