i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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