Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
