Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
