I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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