school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
