ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
