Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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