I want to have your abortion
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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