I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
You left your underwear on the fireplace
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
The power of my boobs compel you
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
