Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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