Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
