We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
