where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I am naked and annoyed.
Randomize