I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
