I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
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