Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(778): View more from British Columbia

i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.

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(760): View more from California

Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.

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(314): View more from Missouri

just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college

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(334): View more from Alabama

I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.

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(516): View more from New York

Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.

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(631): View more from New York

Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...

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(949): View more from California

Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.

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(334): View more from Alabama

ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it

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