I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Can i not drive my cunt home
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
