and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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