I cockslap morals
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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